Locky's English Playground: TV & Quotes: House M.D. Season 8 Finale & The End (With Cool Quotes)

Monday 30 April 2012

TV & Quotes: House M.D. Season 8 Finale & The End (With Cool Quotes)

Series Finale on 21st May 2012
Image from cdn2-b.examiner

When there's a beginning, there's an end.

One of my very favourite TV dramas of all time, House M.D., will end on the 21st May, 2012. This is really sad for me as this terrific show has inspired me a lot both in terms of philosophy and psychology.

Season 1 to 3 Team
Image from FOX

Let's not forget the entries that this show, Hugh Laurie (Dr. House) has inspired me to write, including:

House is a phenomenal character in the history of TV drama, he's rude, he's direct, he's puzzle-oriented, he's bitter, he's sarcastic, he cares little about others, he's a maverick! Yet he is the most hated-and-respected character in the show. He's saved numerous lives, yet he has been set up, divorced, shot twice, concussed in a car crash, admitted to a psychiatric hospital, dumped by his lovers, jailed, suspended from medicine, released on parole, involved in a fake marriage; he has faced deaths of his subordinate, his best friend's girlfriend and his own father, as well as the departures of his colleagues. He has a life full of ups and downs, yet his philosophy never changes.

His famous quotes can be found in almost any episodes, sarcastically witty!

On Lies:

Everybody lies.
Truth begins in lies
It's a basic truth of the human condition that everybody lies. The only variable is about what.
Even fetuses lie.
Dying people lie too, wish they worked less, been nicer, they opened orphanages for kittens
If you can fake sincerity, you can fake pretty much anything.
According to the statistics, the most successful marriages are based on lies. You're off to a great start.
Lies are like children: they're hard work, but it's worth it because the future depends on them.
What they don't confess to is almost always more interesting.
Amazing. A man with only two words at his disposal can still lie.
I've found that when you want to know the truth about someone that someone is probably the last person you should ask.

On Life:

Humanity is overrated
Hope's for sissies.
Adjectives matter: Hate nurses, love naughty nurses.
Disappointment is anger for wimps
Gorgeous women do not go to medical school. Unless they're as damaged as they are beautiful.
We can live with dignity - we can't die with it.
People interest me. Conversations don't.
You are a woman, you can do anything.
Read less, more TV.
Work smart, not hard. That's my philosophy, boss.
When have teachers ever known how to motivate their students?
Words can hurt, you know.
Reality is almost always wrong.
If her DNA was off by one percentage point, she'd be a dolphin.
You want to make things right? Too bad. Nothing's ever right.
Mistakes are as serious as the results they cause!
Successes only last until someone screws them up. Failures are forever.
Silent and unhappy is better than vocal and unhelpful.
Arrogance has to be earned.
We are who people think we are.
You're nuts. Which makes me nuts for arguing with you.
For evil to succeed, all it takes is for good men to do nothing.
...Everything is conditional. You just can't always anticipate the conditions.
The only value of that trust is that you can manipulate them.
You know what's worse than useless? Useless and oblivious.
People don't change.
People don't change. For example, I'm gonna keep on repeating 'people don't change.
People don't learn; people don't change. But you did. You're a freak.
People don't get what they deserve. They just get what they get. There`s nothing any of us can do about it.
Things change, doesn't mean they get better.
Someone's gonna be miserable sometime. Accept it. That's how I stay so happy.
Of course I'm self-interested. We all are. We're born that way. The rest of us are born with consciences.
I'm a jerk to everyone. Best way to protect yourself from lawsuits.
I'm pretty sure I'm not going to like you. It's nothing personal, I don't like anybody.
There's no unconditional love, only unconditional need. Don't make a child a victim of your biological clock.
He's irrational. So are most people. Unfortunately, doesn't make them sane.
Just because you can't feel pleasure doesn't mean you don't want it.
You gave birth to a freak of nature, doesn't mean it's a good idea to treat him like one.
If you wanna do something, you do it, you don't save it for soundbite.
Dr. Cuddy: "You'll figure something out. The two of you have a combined IQ north of 300"
House: "That's also true of five morons.
“LIFE is pain!” House roars, his voice at a pitch never heard from him before. “I wake up every morning, I’m in pain. I go to work in pain. You know how many times I wanted to just give up, how many times I’ve thought about ending it?”
The concept you have about me won't change who I am, but it can change my concept about you.

Season 5 to 6 team
Image from FOX

On Death:

You'd be surprised what you can live without
Almost dying changes nothing. Dying changes everything.
If you're dying, suddenly everybody loves you.

Sarcasm:

If he had a brain, he wouldn't be tending bar.
So you called ME? The guy with 1 good leg and zero leverage.
If I were kidding, I'd dress like you.
You are a wuss: part wimp, part puss.
A psychic once told me that I'm psychic.
Relax, your nose isn't big, it's just conspicuous.
Do I get bonus points if I act like I care?
I'm not deflecting because I'm avoiding something deep. I'm deflecting because I'm avoiding something shallow.
You know how they say, "you can't live without love"? Well, oxygen is even more important.
Love to hear more of your theory, but I don't give a crap.
I want to deal with my problems some place where I can get a decent cappuccino.
Yeah! I wanna save her. I'm morally bankrupt.
They didn't break me. I am broken. Now stop worshipping me and go worry about your own loser life.
Dr. Jaime Conway: I've heard your name.

House: Most people have. It's also a noun.

Sebastian: "Nah, TB's my disease."
House: "You own a disease? Well, I'm sorry I missed the IPO on dengue fever".

Jokes:

I had a heart attack this morning. I can't do any more drugs 'til at least lunch.
Do I have to spell it out for you? Pheochromocytoma. Actually, I'm not sure how you spell it.
Is it still illegal to perform an autopsy on a living person?
House: "[knocking on Wilson's office door] I know you're in there! I can hear you caring!"
I'd like to date her. In the sense that I'd like to jump her repeatedly
Good news is, he's running out of organs to fail.
Make it fast; I don't want to miss the anal cavity search.
She dumped me after I lost those last eighty-five pounds. Said there was less of me to love.
I know head and heart start with the same three letters, but you've got to read all the way to the end.
I'm trying to decide which is riskier; taking crazy risks, or taking advice on crazy risks from a crazed risk-taker.
Other than throwing off the Feng Shui with her ass that faces all eight sides of the ba gua at once?
He's only agreeing with you because he wants to have sex with you. And by the way, I also agree with you.
What’s the opposite of ‘Thank you’? I’m pretty sure it ends in ‘you.
House:"Leg hurts. Would you mind getting me a coffee?" Doctor: "How does coffee help your leg?" House:"It will prevent me from walking to get the coffee."

Season 7 Team
Image from FOX

On Treating Patients:

Confirmation is for wimps and alter boys.
You are either perfect or sick.
Tests take time. Treatment's quicker.
Take a stand. Either do something or shut up.
Better a murder than a misdiagnosis.
Who needs med school when you got Wi-Fi?
Forget it! That battle's over. His rising creatnine is the kidneys' way of saying "go on without me."
Treating for wrong diagnoses can result in side effects, like death.
I noticed a trend: if no one does anything, sick people often get sicker.
Yes, feel free to exclude any symptom if it makes your job easier.
The treatments don't always work. Symptoms never lie.
You're right about me being wrong and wrong about you being right.
Hey, I don't care where an idea comes from, as long as it makes sense and embarrasses someone.
I teach you to lie, cheat, and steal, and as soon as my back's turned you wait in line?
I'm a doctor; when someone tries to call you three times, it's code for pick up the damn phone before someone dies.
I was never that great at math, but next to nothing is higher than nothing, right?
I take risks, sometimes patients die. But no taking risks causes more patients to die. So I guess my biggest problem is I've been cursed with the ability to do the math.
If he gets better, I'm right. If he dies, you're right.
It is the nature of medicine that you are going to screw up.
Treating illness is why we became doctors. Treating patients is actually what makes most doctors miserable.
Seizures are fun to watch, but boring to diagnose.
Livers are important, Cuddy, can't live without them, hence the name.
She needed to be hurt. I wanted to hurt her. Win-win.
Let her vomit through the MRI, that's what nurses are for.
I'm skipping steps because our patient is skipping steps on her way to being dead.
Sorry. I already met this month's quota of useless tests for stubborn idiots.
I thought I'd get your theories, mock them, then embrace my own. The usual.
To do what I always do in these situations. Treat my patient behind his back and make him better.
Just because we call something 'poison,' doesn't mean it's bad for you.
If you want fair, you picked the wrong job, and the wrong profession. And the wrong species. Treat this patient just like he's just another really, really, ugly kid.
Treatment tends to be hit and miss once you're at the sweating blood stage.
Our job is to find what's killing patients, not treat them for chronic idiocy.
You know what would calm the nausea? Vicodin. Marijuana. A coma.
Cancer's boring.

On Observations:

The eyes can mislead, the smile can lie, but the shoes always tell the truth.
Bizarre is good! Common has hundreds of explanations. Bizarre has hardly any.
Labs, schmabs. A good diagnostician reads between the labs.

On Management:

Conflict breeds creativity.

House Season 8
Image from www-tvline-com.vimg.net

On God:

If you talk to God, you are religious. If God talks to you, you're psychotic.
How come God gets credit whenever something good happens? Where was he when her heart stopped?
Nun: "Sister Augustine believes in things that aren't real." House: "I thought that was a job requirement for you people."
Isn't it interesting? Religious behaviour so close to being crazy we can't tell them apart?
Rational arguments don't usually work on religious people. Otherwise, there wouldn't be religious people.
Shockingly, not all religious leaders are honest.
If you believe in God, pray that this works. Also you might want to ask him why he blew off your arm.
Religion is not the opiate of the masses; religion is the placebo of the masses.
The fact that I was wrong is NOT a proof of God.
Religion is not the opiate of the masses; religion is the placebo of the masses.
Eve: "... every life matters to god". House: "Not to me, not to you. Judging by the number of natural disasters, not to god either."

On Pain:

If I'm in a buttload of pain, I need a buttload of pills.
Pain changes things.
Too bitter. I have plenty of bitter already.

On Sex:

Don't blame me, blame my gender.
The problem with sleeping with strangers is ... they're strange.
Sex can be dismissed as hormonal or emotional and be genuinely regretted. Money is always a calculated decision.
Wow. Muscles and curves. My penis is so confused.
I think my penis stopped breathing; Do you know CPR?
Surprisingly, hookers are cheaper. And don't sue for sexual harassment.
If you're here to kill me and rape me, please do it in that order.

And the above is just a few of many many great lines. I will keep updating this list and write more entries related to the drama, especially on the slang and sarcasm which appeared in the show, but as it comes to an end, if I want more quotes of wisdom, I don't think I will be able to find them any more from any other TV shows.

4 more episodes to go. May it be a great ending!

Official Website of House M.D.
Image from fox

Vocabulary:

finale -- (n) [C usually singular] the last part of especially a musical or theatrical performance, which is often very exciting or emotional

terrific -- (adj) informal very good

phenomenal -- (adj) extremely successful or special, especially in a surprising way

sarcastic -- (adj) (UK informal sarky) using sarcasm

maverick --(n) a person who thinks and acts in an independent way, often behaving differently from the expected or usual way

concussed --(adj) suffering from concussion

parole -- (n) [U] when a prisoner is released before their period in prison is finished, with the agreement that they will behave well

humanity -- (n) [U] understanding and kindness towards other people

sissy -- (n) [C] (also cissy) informal disapproving a boy who other boys dislike and laugh at because they think he is weak or interested in activities girls usually like, or a person who is weak and cowardly (= not brave)

wimp --(n) [C] informal disapproving a person who is not strong, brave or confident

dignity -- (n) [U] calm, serious and controlled behaviour that makes people respect you

arrogance --(adj) unpleasantly proud and behaving as if you are more important than, or know more than, other people

manipulate -- (vb) [T] mainly disapproving to control something or someone to your advantage, often unfairly or dishonestly

oblivious -- (adj) not conscious of something, especially what is happening around you

freak --(n) [C] a thing, person, animal or event that is extremely unusual or unlikely and not like any other of its type

moron -- (n) [C] informal a very stupid person

tending bar -- from bartender --(n) [C] mainly US (UK also male barman) someone who makes and serves drinks in a bar

psychic -- (n) [C] a person who has a special mental ability, for example being able to know what will happen in the future or what people are thinking

conspicuous -- (adj) very noticeable or attracting attention, often in a way that is not wanted

crap -- (n) [S or U] offensive solid waste, or when an animal or person produces solid waste

dengue fever -- (n)[U] also known as breakbone fever, is an infectious tropical disease caused by the dengue virus. Symptoms include fever, headache, muscle and joint pains, and a characteristic skin rash that is similar to measles.

autopsy --(n) [C or U] the cutting open and examination of a dead body in order to discover the cause of death

jump sb -- (vb)[T] to want to have sex with sb

alter -- from alter ego [C] (plural alter egos) the part of someone's personality which is not usually seen by other people

screw up -- (adj)

informal

unhappy and worried because of bad experiences

seizure -- (n) [C or U] the action of seizing something by force or with legal authority

mock -- (vb) slightly formal to laugh at someone, often by copying them in a funny but unkind way

embrace -- (vb) [T] formal to accept something enthusiastically

bizarre -- (adj) very strange and unusual

buttload -- from -load suffix all the people or goods in the stated type of vehicle or container

Resources:

House MD Episodes @ Wikipedia

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/House_md_episodes

Speaking: Learning an Accent? @ Locky's English Playground

http://lockyep.blogspot.com/2009/12/speaking-learning-accent.html

Monday 30 April 2012

TV & Quotes: House M.D. Season 8 Finale & The End (With Cool Quotes)

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